


Slow and Steady

by juliathephantom (knitsessed)



Category: Julie and The Phantoms (TV)
Genre: Aged-Up Character(s), Canon Gay Character, Canon Gay Relationship, Closeted Character, Coming Out, Demisexual Julie, F/M, Good Parent Ray Molina, Good Person Carrie Wilson, Julie is 21, Lesbian Carrie Wilson, Lesbian Flynn (Julie and The Phantoms), M/M, No beta we die like Sunset Curve, bi reggie, good brother carlos, i do have a representation checker though
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-10
Updated: 2021-02-13
Packaged: 2021-03-17 02:55:07
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 10,314
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29343183
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/knitsessed/pseuds/juliathephantom
Summary: Julie has sworn off relationships because of the struggles her sexuality bring to the relationship. Luke is determined to show Julie that she can have love without the expectation of sex.
Relationships: Alex Mercer/Willie (Julie and The Phantoms), Flynn/Carrie Wilson, Julie Molina/Luke Patterson
Comments: 32
Kudos: 123





	1. On the Bus

**Author's Note:**

  * For [DeliriumDreams](https://archiveofourown.org/users/DeliriumDreams/gifts).



> The author is attempting to portray sexualities other than her own and apologizes in advance if anything comes across as offensive. Feel free to leave a comment to let me know if anything is done badly. I'd be happy to change things so that I don't misrepresent Julie's sexuality.

Julie can feel her heart speeding up. The guy sitting behind her on an almost empty bus is the definition of a creep. He keeps trying to talk to her and when she ignores him he starts saying some truly vile things. Julie puts her earbuds in but the creep just starts talking louder. He puts his hand on her shoulder and every time she shrugs it off, he replaces it. She’s debating getting off the bus even though it’s not her stop yet to try and get away from him, but she has a feeling he’ll follow her. On the other hand, if she waits until her stop, he could follow her home.

It is then that a cute guy wearing a pastel pink hoodie boards the bus. He immediately seems to notice Julie’s discomfort and sits down next to her. She takes an earbud out and he starts talking.

“Hey, babe, the guys want to know if we want them to order drinks for us. They’re already at the diner.” He shows her his phone, which is open to the Notes app. It says, ‘My name is Alex. I’m trying to get the creep to back off. Play along if he’s bothering you. If not, feel free to tell me to fuck off. FYI, I’m gay.’

“Nah, tell them we’ll just order when we get there. I don’t want the ice to melt.”

The guy that had been harassing Julie frowned. There was no way he was going to get this girl to go out with him if she was already in a relationship with this random guy. Disappointed, he got off at the next stop.

“Oh, my god, thank you so much!” Julie says once the bus pulls away from the stop. “That guy just wouldn’t take no for an answer. I tried ignoring him and that’s when he got cruel. I had no idea what to do.”

“No problem. My mom is many things, but she would kill me if I let a lady get harassed. You gonna be okay now?”

“Yeah, thank you. Oh, my name’s Julie.”

“Alex. You want me to move?” He asks, realizing that he’s still sitting next to her when he doesn’t have to be.

“Nah, you seem cool and I’m still a little freaked out. I don’t super want to be alone right now.”

“You think I’m cool? The guys will never believe that.” Alex says with a self-deprecating laugh.

“The guys?” Julie asks.

“My band. I’m the drummer.”  
“And that’s not cool?” Julie rolls her eyes. “You guys any good?”

“We got on the radio once if that counts?”

“Totally counts. What’re you guys called?”

“Sunset Curve. Tell your friends.” Alex sighs. “I’m turning into Reggie. Kill me if I try handing you a t-shirt and say it’s ‘size beautiful.’”

“Is Reggie one of the people who doesn’t think you’re cool? Because you’re way cooler than someone who flirts by handing out shirts and saying they’re size beautiful.”

“Thanks. That’s a pretty low bar, but… Oh, hey, if you don’t wanna be alone, you’re welcome to come with me. I am actually meeting the rest of the band at a diner. No pressure.”

“Yeah, why not? I was going to go back to my apartment and try to avoid my roommates’ interrogations about why I didn’t go out with the guy they tried to set me up with.”

“Now I’m kind of curious. Is it the guy or the dating?” Alex pauses. “Wait, you just said you wanted to  _ avoid  _ the interrogations. I’m sorry, you don’t have to say anything.”

“No, you’re fine. Um, it’s kind of both. The guy, his name is Nick, he’s really sweet but he just… there’s no spark. When I think about dating him I get all tense and uncomfortable. It just feels wrong, you know?” Alex nods. “And the other thing is that, uh, there are things that come with dating that I just… this is probably going to be complete TMI, but I don’t want to be expected to have sex with someone. Uh, I’m pretty sure I’m demisexual. Like, there are people I find attractive but I don’t want to… I think I’ll need to be in love before I really do anything.”

“Thank you for trusting me. You know you can date someone without having sex with them, right?”

“Yeah, but all the guys I’ve tried dating have pushed me to kiss them or have sex with them and I just don’t wanna deal with it. It’s more hassle than it’s worth.”

“That’s fair. I do have to warn you. The guys are probably gonna try and flirt with you. I can tell them to stop, or you can, but I don’t think we can stop it before they start.” Alex pulls the cord to signal that it’s their stop. “You still wanna come?”

Julie nods, getting off the bus with him. They walk a block back the way they’d come and Alex holds the door to the diner open for her. Three guys spot Alex and start waving excitedly. Julie grabs his arm before they walk over to the table.

“Alex, are you out? Like, do I need to not say anything in front of your friends?” Julie whispers.

“See the guy with the skateboard helmet? That’s my boyfriend, Willie.” Alex blows Willie a kiss.

“So, he’s gorgeous,” Julie points out the obvious. “Nice job.”

“Thanks. I guess I should ask you the same thing. Are you okay with my friends knowing you’re demisexual?” 

Julie takes a deep breath and nods. “Uh, I’m not out to anyone I know but I kind of really want to see what it’s like to have people know, so can this be, like, a trial run for that? Like, we can tell them so I can practice telling people?”

Alex nods. “They’ll be super supportive, Julie. When I came out, Luke’s response was literally just ‘rad’ and when Willie first asked me out, Luke was possibly more excited than I was.”

“And the other guy?”

“Reggie? He decided that if I was brave enough to come out, so was he. He’s bi. My friends are great, Julie. They won’t care about your sexuality beyond making sure you’re happy. That’s what real gentlemen are like.” Alex grabs Julie’s hand and starts gently pulling her over to the table.

“Hey, guys. This is Julie, I met her on the bus. Julie, this is Luke, Reggie, and Willie.”

“Nice to meet you guys,” Julie says, waving awkwardly.

“Alex, she’s hot!” Reggie blurts out, then blushes. “Sorry, that was…”

“Not interested, sorry, Reggie,” Julie takes a couple of deep, slow breaths, then continues talking. “You’re probably not actually interested in me, either. Or you wouldn’t be once…” Julie bites her lip, looking at Alex. He nods reassuringly. “I’m demisexual.”

Reggie and Luke look confused. “Um, what does that mean?” Luke asks finally.

“It’s kind of a spectrum, but for me, it means that I need to be in love before I have any interest in sexual relationships.”

“Why would that make us not interested in you?” Reggie wants to know.

“Um, because if you date me, you don’t even get to kiss me, much less… you know.”

Luke huffs. “So? What kinds of assholes do you hang out around that make you think relationships are just about sex?”

“See?” Alex says.

“See what?” Reggie asks.

“You guys were my practice run. I’m, uh, not actually out. I just… I told Alex because I kind of figured I’d never see him again after tonight and because I feel safe around him and when I told him I wanted to know what it was like to be out, he suggested I tell you guys. He’s been trying to convince me that I shouldn’t just, like, give up on dating because I don’t want to feel like I have to have sex.”

“What? You were gonna never date?” Willie looks surprised. “You’re not aro, are you?”

Julie shakes her head. “No, I want love and romance and all that, but I don’t… I don’t know how to find it without having to do things I’m not comfortable with.”

“Okay, Julie, would you like to go on a date with me?” Luke asks.

Julie’s eyes widen. “You-what?”

Luke grins at her. “Will you go on a date with me? I think you’re beautiful and really cool and I’d like to show you that you can date and have love even though you’re demisexual.”

“But…”

“But what? You can set whatever boundaries you need and I’ll respect them. I’m not gonna get impatient or push you or whatever you’re worried about.  I’m a gentleman.”

“You’re sure?” Luke nods. “Okay, we can try.”


	2. The PowerPoint

Once everyone finishes eating dinner, Julie invites Luke over to her apartment to discuss the boundaries she’d mentioned earlier. They sneak past Carrie and Flynn, who are on the couch watching movies, and settle in Julie’s room. Julie grabs her laptop from the desk and sits on the edge of her bed. She pulls up her PowerPoint while Luke wanders the room.

“What’s that for?” Luke asks, turning to look at her.

“You said I could set my boundaries, right?” Luke nods. “I made a PowerPoint when I was in eighth grade. That’s when I first started to figure out what felt wrong about the relationships my friends were in.”

“Okay, cool. Are you going to show me the PowerPoint?”

Julie responds by turning the screen so that Luke can see it. He pulls Julie’s desk chair over to the side of the bed and sits down on it, looking at the screen. The first slide, color-blocked half-white, half-purple, reads ‘My Sexuality,’ and has a byline that says, ‘Julie Molina.’ “I’ve updated this since eighth grade, but it’s mostly the same.”

“Cool. Let’s see what you’ve got, okay?” 

Julie switches to the second slide. “This is the demisexuality flag.” She tabs over to the third slide, which is purple with white text. It reads, ‘I am demisexual. That means…’

“Hey, so can I just, like, tab through this, then we can talk after I read it? I think that might be easier.” 

Julie nods, biting her lip. She watches Luke’s face as he clicks through the slides. He doesn’t look upset or unhappy, which makes Julie’s anxiety settle a little bit. When he finishes reading the slides, he looks Julie in the eye.  
“This is all completely okay, Jules. Is it okay to call you Jules?” Julie nods. “I’d like it if you would use words when I ask if you’re okay with something when it relates to one of your boundaries. Is that something you can do?”

“Yeah. I like Jules.”

Luke nods. “Okay, so let’s talk. I don’t have the same kinds of boundaries as you do, so you’re going to be the boss of our physical relationship. Does that sound good to you?”

“Yeah. Um, do you have any questions?” 

Julie clasps her hands together on her lap, fingers almost white from the force of her grip. Luke gently reaches over and waits for her to put her hand in his. When she does, he smiles.

“Take a deep breath, Jules. You’re really tense. I’m not going to dump you because you’re not open to being kissed. I know you’re nervous but you don’t have to be. My first question is about your maybes.” Julie tenses. “I don’t want to do anything you’re uncomfortable with, so I need you to clarify what you mean by ‘if done correctly.’”

“Um, I’m not exactly sure. I just, I guess it’s more like, not too much or too soon? It’s kind of a scale, I guess? They’re listed in the order I want them to start happening. I think… I think the hand kisses could start soon-ish? But, like, slowly?”

Luke sighs. “You don’t seem like you know if you’re comfortable with your maybes, so I’m gonna just not do them until you can tell me that they’re yeses, okay?”

Julie smiles at him. “That sounds good. You’re being… you’re being really sweet. Thank you.”

Luke shakes his head at her. “Jules, you’re the boss. I don’t ever want to make you uncomfortable and I’m kind of pissed at every guy you’ve ever known if they’ve all made you feel like you’re asking for too much.”

Julie’s eyes tear up. “Thank you. Um, do you have any other questions?”

“You mentioned in the diner that you’re not out yet. Is coming out something you want to do?” Luke asks.

“I, um. Yeah, I think so. I’m just scared.” Luke nods.

“I get that. You just met Alex today, so you probably don’t know about what happened when he came out. Reggie and I didn’t care, we still don’t. He’s our friend, basically our brother, and it doesn’t matter who he likes so long as they treat him well. Alex’s parents, though… They basically stopped being his parents. Like, they didn’t kick him out or anything, but they stopped caring, I guess. They stopped coming to our shows and basically only talked to him if they had to. He’s gone no-contact for a reason, Jules. He was crushed and I don’t want that for you, but I also know that Alex is glad he came out and that he’s happier now that he doesn’t have to hide who he is.”

Julie sighs. “I’m pretty sure my dad won’t care, but…”

“Are you worried about your mom?” 

Julie frowns. “No, she’s, uh, she died. About five years ago.”

“Oh, Julie, I’m so sorry. Do you want a hug?” Julie nods, so Luke pulls her up off the edge of the bed and wraps his arms around her. When Julie loosens her grip on him, he steps back. “So, if it’s not your parents that you’re worried about telling, then who are you worried about? The girls out there?”

“No, Carrie and Flynn are a couple. I know that they won’t judge me. It’s not so much that I’m worried about telling a specific person, as it is that I’m worried about people just, like, knowing.”

Luke reaches out for Julie’s hand again and squeezes it when she gives it to him. “I think you should tell Carrie and Flynn first, then. They know what it’s like to have a different sexual identity than most people, so I don’t think they’ll have any problem with your sexuality. How can I support you?”

“I don’t know. I- I don’t think I’m ready yet.”

“That’s completely okay. Do you want them to know about me?”

Julie contemplates that. “Yeah, I think so. Yeah.”

“Okay.” He tilts his head. “Do you wanna just get to know each other for a bit? We can go introduce me to your friends whenever you’re ready.”

“Okay, yeah. Um, are you in school?”

“Yeah, I’m a music major at USC, specializing in guitar. You?”

“Me, too. Popular Music.” Luke smiles at that.

“We should play together sometime,” he says. Julie nods. “So how exactly did you end up coming with Alex to the diner?”

“So, I was on the bus and it was mostly empty. This creepy guy was sitting behind me and kept putting his hand on my shoulder and making vulgar comments. Alex got on the bus and seemed to see how freaked out I was, so he came and sat next to me and pretended to be my boyfriend. He had this note on his phone that he showed me, basically introducing himself, saying that he’s just trying to get rid of the creep, and also that he’s gay. The creep got off at the next stop, but I was super freaked out so Alex stayed next to me. I mentioned that I didn’t want to be alone so he invited me to join you guys. I was also trying to avoid the ‘Flynn and Carrie Interrogate Julie’ show.”

Luke squeezes Julie’s hand. “That guy sounds… I’m sorry that happened to you. I’m also just dying thinking about Alex pretending to be straight. How much of a disaster was it?”

“Honestly? Not at all. He basically just acted like a friend but called me babe.”

Luke bursts out laughing. “I- I’m sorry, just… Alex called you babe?” When Luke eventually settles, he explains. “That’s, like, Alex’s least favorite pet name. He almost broke up with Willie the one and only time Willie called him babe.”

“Well, I guess he panicked? I’m not complaining. It worked.”

“How do you feel about being called babe?” Luke asks then.

Julie wrinkles her nose. “Not a huge fan.”

“Okay, then that’s a no.”

A knock on the door startles them. “Julie? I heard someone laughing. Is someone here?”

Julie looks at Luke, panicked. “What do I say?” she whispers. He shrugs. “Uh, it’s nothing, Carrie.” Julie winces when her voice gets squeaky towards the end of her sentence.

“You don’t sound okay, Julie. I’m gonna open the door.” The door opens, revealing the blonde girl from the couch. Her eyes widen. “You do have a guest!”

“Yeah, uh, this is Luke. Luke, this is Carrie.” Luke waves awkwardly.

“Is he your boyfriend? Is that why you bailed on the date with Nick?”

“I bailed on the date with Nick because I didn’t want to go out with Nick.” Julie sighs. “As for the whole boyfriend thing, I don’t know. Luke’s my person, but we haven’t actually discussed labels.”

Luke takes Julie’s hands in his. “I’d like to be your boyfriend if you’re okay with that. No pressure.”

Julie tilts her head, considering. “Yeah, I think that’d be okay.”

“Flynn!” Carrie yells. Flynn, the other girl from the couch, comes running. 

“What’s up, Care?” Flynn looks at Luke, who Carrie is pointing at. “Who’s he?”

“Julie has a boyfriend!”

“Flynn, this is Luke, he’s my boyfriend.” 

Flynn squeals. “Finally!”

Julie looks at Luke and takes a deep breath. “I’m gonna tell them.”

“You sure, Jules?” He asks, squeezing Julie’s hand. She nods.

“They’re my friends. I can trust them.”

“Of course, you can trust us!” Carrie sounds almost angry at the insinuation that she couldn’t. “You can tell us anything.”

“Um, okay. Here goes. I, uh, I’m demisexual.” Flynn and Carrie exchange glances.

“Thank you for telling us, Julie. Do you feel comfortable explaining what that means for you specifically?” Flynn asks, coming to sit on the bed next to Julie. Carrie joins them.

“She has a PowerPoint,” Luke says with a chuckle.

“Yeah, but it’s geared towards romantic partners, not friends.” Julie hesitates, then turns the laptop to face Carrie and Flynn. “Um, so basically, I have to be in love before I feel any sort of sexual attraction. I don’t know for sure because I’ve never experienced it, but I think as my feelings grow, what I’m comfortable with will change, too.” Julie pulls up the boundaries slides. “Um, so, I’m not- um, I feel weird thinking about, like, actually kissing someone. It makes me uncomfortable, but there are things that I am open to and things that I’m hesitant about.”

“So, with Luke…” Carrie trails off.

“We’ve discussed her boundaries and I don’t want to hurt her or push her or anything. She’s in charge,” Luke informs them.

“And you’re not going to, like, cheat on her or something, so that you can have a sexual relationship?”

Luke looks offended. “Of course not! I knew about her sexuality when I asked her out. If I wasn’t okay with it, I wouldn’t have asked her out!”

“Okay, then. We’ll leave you guys alone. Nice meeting you, Luke.”

[Julie's PowerPoint](https://docs.google.com/presentation/d/1-GDEezQnLFqT4jBKpzaSW58rK4v7DxjvNAJZVR_3bEM/edit?usp=sharing)


	3. Coming Out

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Julie comes out to Ray.

The next time Carrie and Flynn see Luke, he’s at their apartment again. It’s been a couple of weeks and Julie is sitting next to him on the couch as they watch a movie. They sit down on the other branch of the L-shaped couch to join the movie marathon. The girls are instantly suspicious because he and Julie are sitting closer than is strictly necessary, but they relax slightly when they see Luke checking on Julie’s boundaries.

“You’re okay right now, right? I’m not too close?”

“You’re fine, Luke. You’re warm. I like that.” Luke holds his hand up for Julie, their signal that he wants to touch her but is giving her the choice. Julie links their fingers together and smiles.

They watch the first movie and Carrie is queuing up the second National Treasure movie when Luke turns to Julie.

“Hey, Jules?” Luke whispers tentatively. Julie hums softly, so he continues. “Can I- never mind.”

Julie turns to look Luke in the eye. “No, Luke, what? You can always ask me anything. The worst that can happen is I’ll say no.”

“Can I put my arm around you?” Luke doesn’t give Julie a chance to answer before he’s trying to explain himself. “Your PowerPoint says you like cuddles so I-” He’s cut off by Julie tucking herself under his arm. His smile is huge, then, as he tugs on one of the curls near his hand. “You’re sure?”

“This is nice, Luke. I do like cuddles.” Julie sighs. “You don’t have to be so worried about me. If I’m not comfortable with something, I can and will tell you.”

“I know, I just… I hate thinking that you’ll let me do something because you’re worried about me leaving. I don’t need- I just need you, boss.” Luke pauses. “Is ‘boss’ okay?”

“Yeah, ‘boss’ is okay.” Julie smiles at Luke. “I’m not worried about you leaving, and even if I were, I wouldn’t set aside my boundaries to keep you here. Just relax, okay?”

Luke nods. “Sure, boss.”

Carrie and Flynn exchange glances. Luke seems like he really cares about Julie and respects her, which is good. They’re still resolved to keep a close eye on him, though. No one hurts Julie on their watch.

Midway through the second movie, Julie rests her head on Luke’s shoulder. His smile is blindingly bright as he tilts his head to press a kiss to the top of hers. “This okay?”

“Yeah.”

When the second movie ends, Luke checks his phone. “I gotta go, boss. I have my early class tomorrow.” Julie stands up, walking Luke to the door. “Can I give you a goodbye hug?”

“Yeah. We still going over to my dad’s tomorrow night?”

“Wouldn’t miss it for the world, boss.” Luke hugs Julie, kissing her forehead, then steps back.

“Say hi to the guys for me?”

“Will do!” Luke waves, stepping out into the hallway. He squeezes Julie’s hand, then releases it. “Bye!”

Once Luke is gone and Julie is back inside the apartment, Carrie and Flynn look at her with matching raised eyebrows.

“Yes?” Julie asks.

“You’re bringing Luke over to your dad’s?”

Julie flushes. “It’s not like that. I’m gonna tell Papí.”

“You’re coming out to him?” Flynn’s excitement has Julie smiling.

“Yeah. Do you guys think it’ll go okay?”

“Julie, remember when he found out I was dating Flynn?” Carrie rolls her eyes. “His response was to ask whose maid of honor you’d be at the wedding. He gave us both the ‘you hurt my daughter, I end you’ speech about each other, and then all he cared about was that we were happy. Do you really think it’ll be any different for you when you come out to him?”

“I know. It’s going to be fine. I’m just nervous, I guess.”

“Aw, hun, it’s going to be great. Your dad is, like, the most accepting and understanding guy I know.” Flynn sighs. “He’s still going to love you.”

Luke picks Julie up from her last class in his car and drives her to her dad’s house. He comes around to her side of the car to open her door for her and offers her his hand as they walk up the driveway. They stop outside the front door and Luke takes Julie’s hands in his.

“Okay, boss. Before we go in, tell me what I can do to best support you.”

“I’m not sure, honestly. I think I just need you to be there. I think my dad’s going to want to know how you feel about dating me given the circumstances so maybe explain all that when he asks?”

“Can do. What about touch? Do you want to hold my hand or would that make things worse?”

Julie sighs. “I don’t know. How about if I decide I want to, I’ll just reach out?”

Luke nods. “Okay, sounds good. Anything else?”

She shakes her head. “I think I’m ready.” She tugs her keys out of her backpack and unlocks the door, leading Luke inside. “Papí? Carlos?” She calls out.

“Julie! You’re here!” A boy who looks like he’s about thirteen comes running into the room, skidding to a stop when he sees Luke. “Who’s he?”

“Carlos, this is my boyfriend, Luke. Luke, this is my brother, Carlos.”

Carlos wrinkles his nose. “Why are you dating  _ Julie? _ ”

“Because I like her, little man. Your sister’s really special.” 

Julie reaches her hand out and Luke takes it, squeezing softly. “Carlos, is Papí here?”

“Yeah, he’s at his desk, going over some photos.” Carlos takes a closer look at Julie. “Are you okay, Julie? You look super nervous.”

“I’m fine.” She sighs. “We’re gonna go talk to Papí and then can I come tell you something important?”

Carlos nods. “Whatever it is, it’s gonna be okay, Julie.”

Julie lets go of Luke’s hand and gives her brother a hug. “Thanks, Carlos.”

Luke follows Julie into the living room, where a man is sitting at a desk, doing something with a computer. “Mija, I didn’t know you were coming over! Who’s your friend?”

“Papí, this is my boyfriend, Luke.”

Ray gets up and shakes Luke’s hand. “Nice to meet you, young man.” He turns to hug Julie. “Mija, are you okay?” he asks, noticing that Julie’s shaking slightly.

“I have something to tell you and I’m nervous. Can we sit down?”

Ray takes a seat on his armchair as Julie and Luke settle down next to each other on the couch. “You can tell me anything, mija. You know that, right?”

“I know. Okay. I can do this.” Luke turns to face Julie and holds out his hands for her to take. She grasps them, squeezing hard.

“You’ve got this, Jules.” Luke squeezes back and grins when Julie’s grip relaxes as the tension in her muscles decreases. She turns back to face her dad and takes a deep breath.

“Okay, here goes. Papí, I’m demisexual.”

Ray smiles reassuringly at his daughter. “Thank you for telling me, mija. I want you to know that I love you no matter what.” Julie gets up and hugs her dad. When she pulls back, he lets her move back to the couch. “I do have a question for you, though.”

Julie raises an eyebrow. “Yeah?”

“What does that mean?”

Julie facepalms. “I guess I should explain that, huh? So, it can mean a lot of different things for a lot of different people, but mostly it means that I don’t experience sexual attraction without being in love. Um, I haven’t experienced it yet, but I think it’s kind of like a lamp where you can control the brightness. It’s either on or off, but the brightness it’s at can change. Once the emotional connection is there, it’s on but dim and as my feelings grow, so will the brightness.”

“Okay, so what does that mean for dating? Like, you introduced Luke as your boyfriend. What does that mean for him?”

“There are things that I’m okay with doing, like holding hands, and there are things I’m not okay with, like kissing. He knows my boundaries, we’ve discussed it, and I trust him to respect them.”

Luke squeezes Julie’s hand to get her attention. He raises an eyebrow and she nods, so he starts talking. “From my side of this, it’s actually kind of really nice because when she’s ready to do something, it feels like a luxury. Like, the first time she let me put my arm around her, it felt like such an incredible gift. I don’t need to kiss her to know that she’s important to me and that I’m important to her.” He sighs. “She’s in control every step of the way and if she decides she wants to be with me in that way, that’ll be great, but even if she’s never ready, I still care about her and want to be with her.”

“I’m glad you found someone who’s so great about what you need, mija. Thank you for trusting me with your whole self. I don’t care about what your sexuality is so long as you’re happy.” Ray turns to Luke. “I think this is where I give you the ‘you hurt my daughter, I end you’ speech.”

Luke holds up his hands defensively. “I’m not gonna hurt her. She’s special, Mr. Molina, and I don’t ever want to push her too far.”

“Then I think we’re going to be okay. Mija, am I supposed to not tell anyone about all this?”

“We’re going to go talk to Carlos next and Flynn and Carrie already know, but please don’t tell anyone else?”

“Sounds like a plan.” Ray gets up, slaps his thighs, and nods. “Go talk to Carlos, and Julie, if you need anything, feel free to come talk to me, okay?”

Julie gives Ray another hug, then she and Luke go upstairs to Carlos’ room to talk to him.

When Julie knocks on her brother’s door, the sounds from his video game stop. “Julie?”

“Yeah, Carlos, can I come in?”

“Sure.” Carlos swivels around on his desk chair as Julie and Luke enter. “You look less nervous, Julie. Did your talk with Papí go okay?”

“It went great. I need to tell you something really personal, okay?”

Carlos nods. “You can tell me anything, Julie. I promise I won’t make fun of you if it’s that important.”

“You’re a good brother, Carlos. Okay, so what do you know about sexuality?”

“Like, being gay or straight or whatever?”

“That’s part of it, but it’s actually more complicated than that. There’s romantic attraction, emotional attraction, and sexual attraction. For me, I’m straight, but I’m also demisexual, which means that I don’t experience sexual attraction without being in love. Do you understand what that means?”

“That you date guys but don’t have sex?” Carlos wrinkles his nose, not enjoying thinking about his sister having sex.

“Yeah, pretty much. The way it works for me is that I can think someone’s objectively attractive and I like soft touches, like holding hands or whatever, but I don’t experience the desire to, like, kiss someone.”

“Okay. Is your boyfriend okay with all that, or do I have to beat him up?”

Luke laughs. This kid can’t be more than ten years old, but he loves his sister enough to try and beat up an objectively buff guy that’s over a decade older. “You don’t have to beat me up, little man. I respect Julie’s boundaries. She’s the boss and she decides what we do.”

Carlos turns to Julie for confirmation. She nods, so Carlos smiles. “Good. Thanks for trusting me, Julie.”


	4. Joining the Band

Julie hates Tuesdays. They’re her busiest day of the week this semester and she just dreads them. It sucks even more than usual now that she’s met Luke, who has Tuesdays as his lightest day. This Tuesday, though, her 8 AM practice room session went well and as she’s leaving, she spots Luke leaning against the opposite wall.

“Luke! What are you doing here?” she asks, approaching him.

“It’s your busy day and you were complaining about being out of coffee, so I brought you something.” He passes over a steaming mocha. “I also thought I’d walk you to your next thing?”

“Aw, you’re sweet.” She takes a sip of her peppermint mocha (she will insist to her dying day that it is not a seasonal drink and should be consumed year-round) and grins. “This is perfect.”

Luke opens his arms to her. Julie hesitates, trying to decide if a hug in the busiest hallway in the music program is okay with her. “You don’t have to hug me if you don’t want to, boss. No pressure, remember?” Julie takes a deep breath and steps into his arms. Luke smiles cautiously. “You sure you’re okay?” Julie nods. “Words, please.”

“I’m fine. I just… public settings make me nervous, but I want to hug you.”

“If you’re sure.” Julie nods again, then releases him, tugging gently on his hand to get him to start walking. He follows her to her professor’s room. “What do you have next?”

“It’s my weekly one-on-one with my professor.”

“Cool. You got this, boss.” Something occurs to Luke then. “I’ve never heard you sing before. Can I sometime?”

“Sure. Um, I have the practice room again at three, if you wanna come sit in?”

“Absolutely. I gotta get going, I have a composition for Henderson that needs a lot of work, but I’ll see you at three?” Julie nods. Luke opens his arms to Julie, then asks, “Can I kiss your forehead?”

“Yeah.” Luke pecks a kiss to her head quickly, then releases her. “Bye, Luke.”

“Bye, boss. You’re gonna do great in there, okay?”

Julie says goodbye, waves, and opens the door. She steps inside, downing the last of her mocha. She tosses the cup into the trash can by the door then sets her sheet music up on the piano. Mrs. Harrison, her professor, comes in, then, and they get started.

Her practice goes well and as they’re preparing to leave (Mrs. Harrison for another class and Julie to go meet Luke), Julie brings up a question. “Hey, Mrs. Harrison, what’s my best song?”

“Define best?” Mrs. Harrison doesn’t look up from the items she’s packing away.

“Like, if I really want to impress someone, what should I sing?” Julie can feel herself blushing.

“Is this for an audition or something?”

“No, uh, my boyfriend. He’s in the guitar program and we realized he’s never heard me sing and I want to impress him.”

Mrs. Harrison looks at Julie then. “Julie, you’re an amazing singer. Anything you sing will impress him. I’d suggest singing something that really resonates with you. You’re at your best when the lyrics are something emotional for you.”

Julie nods thoughtfully. “Thanks, Mrs. Harrison.”

Julie leaves, then, to go meet Luke at the practice room she’d booked. Luke is waiting outside, his guitar case leaning on the wall next to him. 

“Julie!” His face breaks into a big smile. “I’m so excited to hear you sing. I thought maybe I could play something for you, too?”

Julie grins. “I’d like that.” She reaches her hand out for his and squeezes it gently once she has it.

She releases his hand to open the door to the practice room, where she sets down her folder of sheet music on the top of the piano. Luke watches from the doorway as she arranges several pages on the piano, then sits down.

“What are you going to play for me?”

“Shut the door, please?” Luke steps fully inside and closes the door behind him. “I’m going to play a song my mom wrote me. It’s called  _ Wake Up _ and it’s the last thing my mom ever wrote.”

Luke’s eyes widen. “That sounds really special.”

“It is. Just going to warn you, there’s a decent chance I’m going to start crying while I’m singing.”

“Good to know. What do you want from me if you do?” Julie tilts her head, confused. “Like, are you going to want a hug? Some space? To squeeze my hand?”

“A hug, probably.” Julie sighs. “I have to start now or I won’t.” 

Luke waves his hand in a ‘the floor is yours’ gesture and Julie giggles. She starts singing and Luke’s jaw drops. As the song progresses and Julie starts to cry softly, the power in her voice only becomes stronger. As the last lines fade, she stands up from the bench. Luke opens his arms to her and Julie cries against his chest as he holds her.

“Jules, your mom was an incredible songwriter. She’d be so incredibly proud of you, you know that, right?” Julie nods, still hugging Luke tightly. “And, god, Jules, your voice! It’s like a wrecking ball! So powerful, so beautiful. I could listen to you sing all day.”

Julie slowly lets go and as her grip loosens, Luke lets her go, too. “Thank you. Can you play something for me? Distract me?”

Luke nods, grabbing his guitar from its case. He checks the tuning, then turns to look at Julie. “Any requests?”

Julie chuckles. “Anything but  _ Wonderwall _ .”

Luke winces. “Honestly, even if you had wanted  _ Wonderwall _ , I wouldn’t play it for you. That’s so cliche.” He looks thoughtful for a moment then decides what to play. “Okay, so most of my originals are for the band and won’t sound quite right with just the guitar, so here’s  _ Count On Me _ by Bruno Mars.”

As Luke plays, Julie smiles. Even with a fairly basic guitar part, she can see the skill in his fingers and the passion in his voice. Music is what Luke loves and that devotion shines through his playing.

When he finishes the song, Julie claps. “That sounded really good.”

“Thank you!” Luke hesitates, then asks, “are you feeling better?”

Julie nods. “Yeah, thanks.”

“Then can I ask you a question?”

“Yeah, what’s up?”

“Will you please join the band? You’re incredible!”

Julie laughs. “Don’t you think Alex and Reggie should have a say?”

“Fine, sure, let’s go ask them.” Julie packs up her sheet music, Luke puts his guitar back in the case, and they climb into Luke’s car to drive over to his apartment.

While they sit in traffic, Julie takes a deep breath. “Luke? Can we talk about something?”

Luke glances over at Julie, before returning his attention to the road. “Of course. What’s up, boss?”

“I’m ready to change a boundary from my maybes list.”

“What are you changing?” Luke asks cautiously.

“You can kiss my hand now. Like you kiss my forehead?”

“You’re sure?”

“Yeah, I mean, unless you don’t want to?” Julie’s worried now. What if she’s just made him uncomfortable?

Luke takes one hand off the wheel, grabs Julie’s hand, and presses a light kiss to the back of her knuckles. He smiles as he asks, “Like that?”

“Yeah, like that.” Luke continues holding her hand for the rest of the drive, fingers lightly intertwined so that if he needed to take the wheel quickly, he could without hurting her. 

When they park in Luke’s building’s lot, he comes around the car and opens Julie’s door for her. He takes her hand to help her out of the car, then brings her fingers to his lips, gently brushing a kiss across the back of her hand.

He lets her into the building, then turns to face her, taking both of her hands in his. “Serious question: elevator or stairs?”

Julie laughs. “What floor are you on?”

“The fifth.”

“Oh, elevator, definitely.” Julie rolls her eyes. “No way am I climbing that many stairs if I don’t have to.”

Luke lets go of one of her hands and gently tugs her towards the elevator bank. He presses the button to call it, then turns to watch Julie fidget with her necklaces. He squeezes her hand. “What’s wrong?”

“I’m nervous.”

“About… talking to the guys?” Julie nods. “You’ve already met them, boss. They like you, okay?”

“But they  _ know _ .” Julie emphasizes the last word.

“Yeah, but they don’t care. Did they make you feel uncomfortable at the diner?” Julie shakes her head. “Then why is it different now? I’m not judging, I’m just trying to understand.”

“The only people I interact with who know are people I trust. I just- they’re basically strangers and I told them when I thought I’d never see them again so it feels weird to think about interacting with people I don’t really know who  _ know _ .”

“Hey, Jules, look at me. If you’re uncomfortable, we don’t have to go talk to them, okay? We can get back in the car and go somewhere else, or we can sit in there until you feel ready. It’s up to you, boss.”

The elevator doors open, then, and Julie takes a deep breath. She steps inside, tugging Luke in behind her.

“I trust you. If you say it’s going to be fine, it’s going to be fine.”

When the elevator doors open on Luke’s floor, Julie steps out first. She lets Luke lead her to his apartment, and takes another deep breath when he puts his key in the lock. 

“You sure, boss?” Luke confirms one last time.

“Yeah, let’s do this.” Luke opens the door and Julie follows him in. 

Reggie notices them first. He, Alex, and Willie are lounging on the couches, watching Chopped. 

“Julie!” He exclaims. “Hi, how are you?”

“I’m okay. How are you?” Julie smiles slightly at the enthusiasm with which she’s been greeted.

Luke holds out his hand for Julie and she takes it, squeezing tightly. Reggie starts babbling about how he’s convinced that this one contestant from the episode they watched prior to the current one got cheated and totally should have won.

Willie scoffs. “You didn’t even taste his dish! How can you be so sure his food was superior?”

Alex interrupts the budding argument to ask Julie why she looks so nervous. Julie sighs.

“I, uh, it feels weird.” Luke squeezes her hand comfortingly, giving her the courage to keep talking. “Like, you guys  _ know _ and I barely even know you.”

Alex nods knowingly. “I get it. Before I was out, it freaked me out to think that someone might know and you know that we  _ actually _ know. You can trust us, though. Have we done anything to make you uncomfortable?”

“No, of course not! You guys have been super sweet. I’m fine, I just need to get used to it.” Julie smiles. “I told my dad and my brother. Also my roommates.”

“Good for you, Julie. Did it go okay?”

Julie nods. “I’m not entirely sure my brother completely understood what I was saying, but he threatened to beat up Luke if he pushed me too far, so I think he took it well.”

Alex chuckles. “That’s good. So, what brings you here today?”

Luke lights up. “I asked Julie to join the band but she said you guys needed to have a say, so I brought her here to sing for you.”

The guys grin. “She’s that good?”

“She’s amazing! Sing something, boss!”

“Will you play backup?” She asks Luke. He nods. “Do you know  _ I Lived _ by OneRepublic?”

Luke smiles. “That’s a good song.” He takes his guitar out of its case and checks the tuning again. “Ready?”

Julie gives him a thumbs-up, so he starts playing. Julie’s vocals come in on cue and Alex and Reggie’s faces are comical in their awe.

By the time the song is over, they’re practically bouncing. 

“Oh, my god, Julie, you have to join the band!” Alex almost shouts. “You’re amazing!”

“Okay, then. I guess I’m joining the band?”

Luke cheers. “Yes!”


	5. Communication

Luke is struggling. He and Julie have been together for almost three months now and it’s great. It really is, but he wants more. She’s beautiful and amazing and talented and basically perfect and he finds himself wanting to spend all day holding her or kiss her, like, actually on the lips and it’s  _ hard _ . Luke’s love language is touch and he needs more but he doesn’t ever want to make Julie uncomfortable.

The other thing is that he’s pretty sure he’s in love with her. He knows she’s not there yet,  _ he knows _ , but it’s still hard to resist the urge to just blurt it out. Especially, when, like today, he’s in her studio for band practice and her eyes are bright with joy and the sunlight through the windows lights her up and makes her look like an angel. She finishes singing  _ Edge of Great _ and Luke can’t stop himself.

“You’re amazing, Jules.”

She frowns. “No, I’m not.”

“You seriously are. There’s a reason I’m in love with you, boss.”

Alex drops a drumstick in shock and it clatters on the floor. Julie’s eyes are wide and she’s not saying anything. Alex scoops up his drumstick and heads towards the door.

“We’re gonna… go.” Reggie practically runs out after the drummer.

“Luke…” Julie finally says. Luke winces. That doesn’t sound like a good sign. “I’m sorry. I don’t- I’m not- like, I care about you but I’m just not there yet.”

“I know.” Luke sits down on the couch and puts his face in his hands. “I didn’t mean to say anything. I was going to wait until I thought you  _ were _ there, but I just couldn’t keep it in any longer.”

“I wish I could be there for you.” Julie comes to stand in front of him and puts her hand on his shoulder. “Luke, look at me. I don’t want to hurt you and I feel like I am. What do you need?”

Luke takes a deep, shuddering breath, looking up at her. “More.”

“More? Can you be specific?”

“I know you’ve got boundaries and I want to respect them, I really do. I just… My love language is touch, Jules. I need to be able to touch you and kiss you and it sucks because I don’t want to push you but I need more.”

Julie sits down next to him and takes his hand in hers. “We need to talk about this, then. I want to be everything you need but I don’t know if I can be. Maybe you should find someone else.”

Luke looks horrified. “No! No, Jules, no. I don’t want anyone else. You’re it for me. It’s okay, we don’t have to do anything more. I’ll be fine.” His grip on her hand tightens almost desperately, as though if he just holds on tight enough he can keep her. 

“You won’t be.” Julie sighs. “Be honest with me. What do you need specifically? How much more do you need, Luke? Talk to me.”

Luke tries to answer her but no words come out. His mouth opens and closes for a few moments, then he sighs. “Can I kiss you?”

Julie thinks about that. She’d expected that she’d react to that question with a decisive no, some anxiety, maybe. But… the answer isn’t no. At least not as strong of a no as she’d expected it to be.

“We can try. Be gentle?”

Luke’s eyes light up. “Really?” He takes a deep breath, trying to settle himself. “Are you sure? I really don't want to make you uncomfortable. I think that would feel worse than not being able to kiss you.”

“I want you to.” Luke grins.

He can tell that Julie is still super tense, so he tries to figure out how to make it easier for her. “Do you want me to just, like, go for it or do you want to wait until a more natural moment? Do you want to kiss me? How do you want to do this?”

Julie looks panicked at all the questions. “Um.”

Luke sighs. “Take a deep breath, boss.” He tucks a strand of her hair back behind her ear. “How are you doing? We can wait if that’ll be better for you.”

Julie smiles shakily at Luke. “Do it now before I freak myself out too much.”

Luke nods, cupping her cheek in his palm. He slowly leans in then gently brushes his lips against Julie’s. They kiss briefly before he separates their lips, resting his forehead against hers instead. “Was that okay?”

Julie smiles at him. “Yeah. It was nice. Is that enough for you?”

“I think so. We need to talk about rules for when I can do that, but I think I can be happy with that.” Luke shakes his head. “I  _ am _ happy with that. Can I do it again?”

She nods. This time, when Luke kisses her, it’s a little bit longer, but Julie doesn’t mind. She can feel him smiling against her lips. When he pulls away this time, though, his eyes are shiny with tears. “Luke, are you okay? Why are you crying?”

“Happy tears, sweetheart. These are happy tears.” Luke pauses. “Is ‘sweetheart’ okay?”

Julie nods, then remembers that Luke wants words. “Yeah. ‘Sweetheart’ is okay.”

Luke’s smile is blinding. “Thank you, Jules. Let’s talk now, okay? I don’t want to upset you so I need to know what circumstances are ok for me to kiss you.”

“In private.” Julie’s answer is immediate. “I don’t- you can’t do that around other people. Not yet, at least.” 

Luke agrees to this. “Any guidelines to when? How often? Am I supposed to ask first?”

“I think- there will probably be days where I just don’t want you to kiss me at all. It’s less about the kissing and more about, like, if I’m already having a rough day, sometimes I might just need you to hold me and tell me that everything’s going to be okay. I’ll tell you when that happens. As for how often… I’ll tell you if you’re doing it too much. I don’t know exactly how often is too often. I’d like it if you’d ask first, especially if you want to kiss me more… intensely? I don’t know if that’s the right word. These little kisses, though? That’s okay. You can do that spontaneously.”

“Sounds like a plan.” Luke checks the time on his phone. “We’re good, right?”

“We’re good,” Julie confirms.

“Okay, then. Do you want to go inside and see your family or are you ready to go?”

“I actually don’t think they’re here. I think Carlos has a game tonight.”

Luke nods. “Then I can drive you back to your apartment?”

“Yeah. I’ve got some stuff I need to do tonight before class tomorrow.”

Luke holds Julie’s hand the whole drive back to her apartment, smiling. He walks her up to her door, then holds out his arms for a goodbye hug. Julie hugs him, then, while still in his arms, whispers, “You can kiss me goodbye if you want.”

Luke grins, brushing his lips against Julie’s. “I love you. You’re amazing and I need you to know that.” He kisses her one last time, then pulls away entirely. “Bye, sweetheart.”

“Bye.”

Julie enters her apartment, shuts the door behind her, then leans against it, sliding down until she’s sitting on the floor like she’s in a cheesy rom-com. She just needs to take a moment to think. 

She’s not upset. She likes kissing Luke. Maybe not the way he likes kissing her, but it feels nice. Sort of sweet and it makes her feel kind of special, like she’s his world, when she thinks about how happy kissing her makes him. The way he looks after he kisses her is the way he looks when the band is rocking out and they finally get a song to sound exactly right, or when they come up with the perfect lyric. He looks at her like she’s music and that’s something she can appreciate.

Carrie and Flynn see her, then, as they pass the entrance to the apartment on their way to the living room to watch TV. 

“Julie? Are you okay?” Flynn asks. “Did something happen?”

“Luke kissed me,” Julie says softly.

Flynn starts pacing, ranting about how she’s going to find Luke and end him. Carrie offers her brother Bobby’s assistance. 

“Bobby’s gotten into a lot of fights and he likes Julie. He’d be happy to help. Let’s go yell at Luke, first.”

“Guys!” Julie interrupts their plotting. “I told him he could.”

Flynn’s pacing stops abruptly. “I think we might need some more information.”

“He told me that he loves me. I’m not there yet. I mean, I care about him, but it’s not love yet, so I told him that. He explained to me that he wants to respect my boundaries but that he needs more, so I asked him what he needed. His love language is touch, guys.”

“That doesn’t mean you need to let him kiss you!” Carrie protests. “He needs to respect your boundaries.”

“He does!” Julie sighs. “You guys need to remember that my relationship isn’t just about me. What Luke needs matters, too. I know you guys are ride-or-die friends and that you want everything to be perfect for me, but I have to compromise too.”

“But you’re okay? You’re not upset?” Flynn confirms.

“I’m fine. It was nice.”

“Then… why are you sitting on the floor by the door?”

“I just needed to think for a minute, that’s all.” Julie gets up and they migrate over to the couch, where Carrie changes the line of conversation slightly.

“So, how was it?”

“Honestly? It was sweet. He was gentle with me and then we discussed rules for when he can kiss me. I think we’re going to be okay.” Julie chuckles. “He was so happy he started crying a little.”

“That’s cute,” Flynn concedes. “So, just to make sure, I don’t have to kill him?”

“You don’t have to kill him,” Julie agrees. “I’d be pretty upset if you did.”


	6. Movie Marathon

Julie and Luke had decided to have a movie marathon about nine months into their relationship. Alex, Reggie, and Willie had been invited, and they were all joining Carrie, Flynn, Julie and Luke in the girls’ apartment with plans to spend Saturday binging all eight Harry Potter movies. They’d agreed that, while J. K. Rowling was highly problematic, the movies were still good and the books were their childhoods, so a marathon it was.

Luke arrives at the apartment early, wanting to talk to Julie about the rules for movies. Normally, movie night is just the two of them, so Luke is allowed to kiss her and cuddle with her. He distinctly recalls, though, that Julie isn’t ready for him to do that publicly and he wants to know where their best friends fall on the private-public scale.

Julie leads Luke into her bedroom, where they sit cross-legged on her bed, facing each other. Luke holds out a hand and Julie takes it happily.

“Okay, so I just want to make sure I’m clear on the rules for watching movies with other people. Can we cuddle?”

“Yeah, I’d like that.”

“Good, I’d like that, too. Would you prefer to cuddle up next to me, or do you feel comfortable sitting on my lap?”

Julie contemplates that. “Let’s start with next to you but maybe I’ll be okay with sitting on your lap after a little bit? Once everyone is distracted by the movie?”

Luke grins. “That’s fair. One more question: am I allowed to kiss you?” Julie hesitates, so Luke rushes to reassure her. “No pressure, sweetheart. I just need to know so that I don’t upset you.”

“Little kisses? If no one’s watching.”

Luke smiles. “Are you sure?”

“Yeah. I’m sure. I’ll tell you if I change my mind, okay?”

“Sounds good.” Luke hates having these awkward conversations, but the outcome, where he’s dating Julie and knows exactly how far he can take things, makes it worth it. Communication is hard, but being without Julie seems much harder.

Flynn knocks on the door. “Julie, Luke, the guys are here. Are you ready to start the movie?”

“Give us one minute?” Julie calls. They hear Flynn moving away, so they take that as a yes. Julie stands up and pulls Luke up with her. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah.” Luke squeezes Julie’s hand. “Can I kiss you before we go out there?”

“Sure.” Luke angles his head to allow himself to buff his lips across Julie’s. He gently brushes his tongue against her bottom lip and feels her gasp against him. He pulls back right away. “Sorry! I’m sorry. I got caught up in kissing you. I didn’t meant to-”

Julie presses her lips to Luke’s briefly, the first kiss that she’s initiated. “You’re okay. I’m not upset, Luke. That was nice. You just startled me, that’s all.”

Luke sighs in relief. “Okay. Okay, good. Do you- are you ready to go out there?”

Julie nods, taking his hand. They head over to the living room, settling on the couch. Luke sits down, and Julie curls into his side, legs tucked up on the cushion next to her. He wraps an arm around her shoulder and uses that positioning to play with a curl near his fingers.

“You good, boss?”

“I’m good.” 

Reggie, who has been put in charge of the remote, hits play on the first movie. It takes until midway through Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets, but Julie finally feels comfortable moving onto Luke’s lap. She tries to be subtle, getting up to grab another can of soda and just, like, sitting on his lap instead of next to him, but she can feel Carrie and Flynn sneaking glances at her and Luke, trying to make sure she’s okay. She nods at them and they relax.

Luke’s smile is huge when she rests her head on his shoulder and he presses a quick kiss to her hair. As the movies play on, Julie notices that Luke is spending way more time watching her than the TV. He glances around and notices that Alex and Willie are asleep, Willie’s head in Alex’s lap. Reggie is intently focused on the movie (they’re on Goblet of Fire by now) and Flynn and Carrie are whispering to each other.

Now, he decides. He desperately wants to kiss Julie in the presence of other people and she’d said he could so long as no one is watching. No one is watching so he cups her chin in his hand, lifting her face such that he can just lean down and kiss her. He raises an eyebrow, hoping that she understands what he’s saying. She nods slightly, so Luke kisses her softly. It’s a quick, gentle kiss, but the thrill of being able to kiss her around their friends makes it, in Luke’s opinion, one of the best kisses they’ve shared.

When their lips separate, Luke locks eyes with her. 

“Okay?” he whispers.

“Yeah. I liked that.”

Luke grins. “I liked that, too.”

They stay curled up together until after Goblet of Fire, when Flynn suggests that everyone break for pizza. Luke is thrilled when Julie settles back on his lap when they return to the living room for the rest of the movies. She’s slowly becoming more open to being physically affectionate with him and he loves it.

As The Order of the Phoenix’s opening scene starts to play, Julie softly cards her fingers through Luke’s hair. She scratches his scalp a little bit and he bites back a moan. Having Julie voluntarily touch him of her own volition will always be special, and he loves having his hair played with. The gentle tug on his hair as her fingers slide between the strands and rub against his head is everything in that moment.

Julie is surprised to find herself enjoying the physical contact and is even more surprised to realize she wants more of it. Luke isn’t just objectively attractive anymore. He hasn’t been for a while, if she’s being honest with herself. He’s attractive, yes, but he’s also more. Julie suddenly realizes, as he rubs his thumb against her hip, that she loves him. He’s everything to her and she actually wants his hands on her, wants to kiss him more passionately. The kiss he’d given her that had startled her earlier that night startled her not because it was new or unwelcome, but because it felt right.

Once the movies have ended, Alex and Reggie head out, but Julie asks Luke to stay back for a bit. She grabs his hand and leads him to her room. Julie sits Luke down on her bed. Their backs rest against her headboard and their hands are entwined.  "Julie opens her mouth to tell Luke the thing she'd summoned him to her room for. She can totally do this, but nothing comes out

“Jules, it’s okay, boss. Take a deep breath. You can tell me anything.”

“I realized something during the movie marathon. Luke, I love you.” Luke freezes. Four words that he’s been waiting over nine months to hear. It’s been six since he told her he loves her and he’s desperately wanted to hear it back since.

“You- are you sure?”

Julie nods. “Yeah. I love you, Luke.”

“I love you, too, Jules. What made you realize that you love me?”

“We were snuggled up on the couch and you were holding my hand and the arm around my waist was rubbing my hip and I realized I wanted more. I started thinking about it and I realized that I wanted more because I love you. It feels right to be touched by you because I trust you and I love you and I feel safe with you.”

Luke’s eyes are shiny. “You love me,” he repeats. “You love me.”

He leans in to kiss her, pausing a hair’s breadth away. “Can I try kissing you like I’ve been dreaming of?”

“Yeah.” Luke’s lips are on hers, then, and she’s kissing him back with more passion than she’s ever displayed and it’s everything Luke could have hoped for. 

When they finally separate to breath, Luke grins at her. “Was that okay?”

“You don’t have to worry anymore, Luke. Kissing you feels right. I love you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> and... done!


End file.
